I Don't Hate You Anymore
by Itako no Anna Kyoyama
Summary: Ryou's POV, Ryou thinks about how life has been since Bakura left to the Afterlife.


Authoress's notes: This is my first little fic posted here. It's from Ryou's POV. If I get enough reviews, I might post a few other chapters from different people's points of view. This is set after the end of the series. So, minor spoiler to be noted!

Disclaimer: Bah. If I owned Yuugiou, fan girls everywhere would be very happy. 

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I'm staring out the window in class, trying to figure out why it happened.

I don't know why it happened. Everyone tells me it was time, and they explain what happened, but it doesn't make sense. I mean, it makes sense, but…it doesn't.

I suppose…it was for the best. I've certainly been healthier. Of course, I still have a few of the scars you left. I look at the sometimes, and I remember how you would hover over me with a knife or some other means of drawing blood--it didn't matter what it was, really. It hurt, that's all I knew. I remember thinking that if this were a horror movie, there would be a thunderstorm outside, and lightening would illuminate your face, that face so similar to mine.

I hated you then. I hated the pain you put me through.

Then something happened. I don't remember that day much. I should, but I don't. I just know that one day, you were gone.

The Ring was gone, too. That precious gift given to me by Father. It meant so much to me, but everyone said it was for the best that it was gone.

For the first few days after you left, after you abandoned me, I told myself that this was what I wanted. I needed to be free of you.

My grades have improved in school and I eat more. You aren't here to distract me from my homework. You aren't here to keep me from eating. You aren't here.

You aren't here.

I've noted a change in Yuugi, too. He seems…lost. He still smiles and laughs, he is still sweet, and he certainly shows that he gained confidence during the presence of his Yami. But his eyes are duller.

I've noticed that mine are, too.

I've tried talking to Yuugi about it a few times. He seems to be suffering the same emotions I am. The same feeling that we've lost a part of ourselves.

The other half of our soul.

I don't hate you anymore.

If you were here now, you'd laugh at me. You'd tell me that I'm being pathetic and weak. You'd tell me that I should hate you and I should fear you, because you hate me and want nothing more than my fear and pain.

You'd laugh at me in that sadistic little way, and I would await what you did next.

I've realized, I suppose, that I never really feared you, or hated you. I wanted to have what you did. I wanted to be courageous, like you. I wanted to stand up for what I wanted. I didn't want to let things stand in my way.

You were everything I am not and will never be.

Sometimes, when it rains outside, I take down some of the little game figures that used to hold the souls of my friends--in particular, the one that held my soul once, and later, yours. I put that one under my pillow at night sometimes. It makes me feel like you might be near me. It took a while for me to admit that I miss you. And when I finally admitted it, I was pretty sure I'd lost my last bit of sanity. I mean, who would miss you? Who in their right mind would miss the person that hurt them so much, and somehow, continues to hurt them even more even though they are gone...?

You're gone, I know. I have to accept that fact. But sometimes, I don't want to. I have tried to completly accept it, but then I'll dream about you. I'll remember you. And afterwards it's so hard to tell myself that you're gone forever. I hope, sometimes, that I'll wake up, and you'll sneer at me and toss me out of bed and tell me to get my worthless, pathetic ass up and go to school.

I don't know why you encouraged me to go to school. You usually whined the whole time we were there.

But it made me laugh. And there were times that I was so sure you cared about me.

I remember that duel against the Pharoah, during Battle City. I was confused when you sent me out. I mean, here I was, on a blimp, in the middle of a duel I had no recollection of entering. And I was hurt, and weak, and dizzy. I pleaded for Yuugi--no, the Pharoah--to stop, but he fired away anyways. If you hadn't come out then, if you hadn't took the blast instead of me, I'd be dead.

Of course, after I think about this, I realize that you probably just did it because you didn't want to lose my body. I was your host and you couldn't very well take over the world without a body.

Still, it was the thought that counts, right?

The bells rings. School is over. I remember walking slowly home, wondering what awaited me when I got there.

I grab my bags and wave goodbye to all of my 'friends'. We never really did hang out much after you left. I guess they never forgave me for the whole 'stole-their-souls-and-sealed-them-in-game-pieces' thing. Heh.

I walk slowly home now, knowing that no one is there.

I wonder how you'd react if you knew what I feel now.

I wonder how you'd react if you knew I love you.

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Ok, yeah, so it's kind of short, but Kachan likes it…sorta. Anyways, review, peeps! Love you lots!


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